Friday, December 1, 2017

The Prison Guard’s Occurrence book



This week Trinbagonians were shocked by the news of a woman making a daring escape for freedom; yes PNM Senator Allyson Baksh resigned. Less shocking was the news that fraudster Vicky Boodram had escaped the women’s prison in Golden Grove. After all, no one expects the nation’s top security personnel to be a match against the wits of a bogus travel agent.

The Trinidad Express has received the official prison guard Occurrence Book, which logs the activities in the Golden Grove Prison. Here is a transcript of last week’s log and correspondence between the night guard on duty and the Prisons Commissioner:
November 25th 2017.
9.30pm. Prison Guard Stephen Dillon reporting for night duty at Golden Grove prison.
10.pm.  Caught prisoners Lee and Murphy watching videos on Facebook. I demanded to know who gave them the Wi-Fi password. They informed me it was my mother. But that is a lie because my mother does not know the Wi-Fi password. I sure it was Prison Guard Balgobin. He always does things like this.
10.30pm. I looked in on Prisoner Boodram. She once again tried to sell me a package vacation to Margarita. She said this deal going fast and if I act right now I can get it for the low price of a hacksaw. I told her it really tempting but I lend my brother in law Keith my hacksaw. And he does never return things.

November 26th 2017.
Attention Mr. Dillon. Re: Last night’s log. Please be reminded that prisoners are not allowed to possess electronic devices of any kind. You are to immediately confiscate such devices if found.
Prison Commissioner,
Gerard Wilson.

November 26th 2017.
9.30pm. Prison Guard Stephen Dillon reporting for night duty at Golden Grove prison.
9.45pm. Caught Prisoners Lee and Murphy again watching videos on Facebook. I told them I need to confiscate their device. They said, "Try it nah". As you know Sir, Prison Guards have been shot recently. Sir, I not getting shot because somebody want to watch ‘Didi the Trini RD’. So I leave them. I think we should just change the Wi-Fi password, Sir. And not tell Prison Guard Balgobin.
10. pm. Prisoner Hutching asked me if I heard they release Spanish and Chemist. I say yeah, I hear so. I tell her I glad because them Beetham people not easy. Prisoner Hutching then get vex and say she from Beetham and how I stereotyping her. I tell her we  standing in Golden Grove not Beetham and I don’t want to hear her problems.
10.30pm. Prisoner Boodram asked me if I heard the good news. I said no. She say, "Well you win a million dollars in the Boodram lotto draw!"  I told her I didn’t enter any Boodram lotto. But she say I still win, and that all I have to do is let her go to her office to do the paperwork. But it only valid if we leave right now and don’t tell nobody. I say, I have to celebrate first and went to get my piece of cake I left in the staffroom.
10.33pm. Discovered somebody eat my cake I leave in the staffroom. It had to be Prison Guard Balgobin! He always does this. One time he eat all the chicken in my lunch and left all the rice. And now, I lost my prize.
November 27th 2017.
Attention Mr. Dillon. Re: Last night’s log. I want to stress that no prisoner is to leave the prison without written authorization. If you or anyone needs clarification on this please refer to me.
Prison Commissioner,
Gerard Wilson.

November 27th 2017.
9.30pm. Prison Guard Stephen Dillon reporting for night duty at Golden Grove prison.
10.pm Watched an episode of ‘Didi the Trini RD’ on Facebook with prisoners Lee and Murphy. Didi real funny Sir. I understand why they watch this every night now.  
10.30pm. Two policemen came to the prison and informed me that they had a court order for prisoner Boodram to appear in night court in Tunapuna. I told them that I didn’t know we had night court in Tunapuna. They say yeah, plus Tunapuna have a new Burger King an all now. Trinidad getting rel develop boy.
5.am. Received a call from the Police Commissioner saying they need clarification on who authorized prisoner Boodram to be released. I say, "I refer you to Prison Commissioner Gerard Wilson".

November 28th 2017.
All staff.
Re: Vicky Boodram incident. I am satisfied all protocols and procedures were followed.
Prison Commissioner,
Gerard Wilson.

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