Every Trinbagonian man versed in the art of romance knows that to win the love and affection of a beautiful and enchanting woman, you need to look her right in the eye and say, “Aye gyal, you is a table or what? Because I want to ress something on yuh real bad." This is preceded with smiling lecherously while she contemplates how brilliant you are. Of course women these days are different. They don’t cook, or clean or appreciate the effort men make to point out in public what disgusting things we want to do to them.
Take for example the #metoo hashtag which has swept social media this week. Women all over the world used the hashtag to describe personal incidents of harassment or abuse with the rallying cry “me too”. These women should really be ashamed of themselves. They are completely disregarding the feelings of men who wanted nothing more than to point out that they should smile more. Or take off their clothes. Or just keep their mouths shut about their assaults. I saw Express colleague Kim Boodram posting on Facebook about the constant harassment she endures while commuting to work. I wrote her a nice email saying, “Your posts have really moved and inspired me. You wanna go for a ride on the Boodan train?” But was she grateful? No. She unfriended and blocked me. And made a police report.
What these #metoo women don’t seem to understand, is that men are just doing what is natural to them. It is programmed in our DNA through thousands of years of evolution. For example, when a caveman wanted to catch the eye of a fine looking cave woman, he would carve a drawing of his penis onto a piece of wood and send it to her via a pterodactyl. Sometimes at the cave office, a caveman boss would say to his female cave employee, “Hey Ulga, there’s a managerial opening in the Mammoth Hunting Department. I think you’d be good for it. Providing you know how to rub sticks together to make fire, if you know what I mean. And before you answer, you should know that the last girl who refused to start my fire is back living in a tar pit."
Plus, everyone knows that women are attracted to men with good looks, money and power. So women have no right to accuse men like me of harassment just because we have none of those things. According to a recent study from international research groups Promundo and U.N. Women, a startling factor for street harassment in the Middle East wasn’t a lack of education, but unemployment, political instability and lack of opportunities. "These young men have high aspirations for themselves and aren't able to meet them," say the researchers. "So they [harass women] to put them in their place." So when you think about it; street harassment is kind of women’s fault.
Recently, the showbiz world was rocked with news that movie mogul Harvey Weinstein had supposedly sexually assaulted dozens of women who sought roles in his movies. Apparently, if you were an actress auditioning for 'A Month by the Lake' your chances of landing the role would have been greatly improved by spending five minutes on your knees. But was what Weinstein did so wrong? All he did was coerce women into doing what he wanted by dangling their dreams and other things in front of them. Some might argue that if those women didn't want to be abused, they should have simply ignored Weinstein. Just because your entire life and career is in the hands of another person doesn’t mean you have to do what they tell you. Just ask Dr. Rolph Balgobin.
Of course what’s really wrong about the #metoo craze is that it paints all men as abusers. And all men are not abusers. That’s what’s really important when women talk about sexual abuse and harassment-not empathizing with them. Not learning about what victims go through. Not opening your eyes to the unique problems that your female coworkers and friends go through every day and keep bottled up inside-but reminding them that women can be abusers too.
1 comment:
Fair Enough. There are better ways to raised awareness.
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